It would be the same if I’d only had relationships within my own age range.
My boyfriend and I are not immune to the effects of these judgments.
Just a month ago, we had to have talk about whether or not we should stay together or break up — simply because of the pressure put on us from hearing so many critical opinions about our relationship.
At the beginning of our relationship, my friends were concerned that his age automatically revealed his readiness to have a long-term relationship and plan a future together.
People in our lives also expressed the fear that if we were to stay together, we may never have a “normal” life.
doing his A-Levels when I was in year five, at University when I was finishing Primary school and when he got engaged to his first wife I was doing my AS levels. From school, where I would form adoring romantic attachments to members of the teaching staff while my friends lusted over Justin Bieber, to my gap year, where everyone else took off around the world and shagged surf instructors while I stayed in London, going to restaurants and concerts with men who were old enough to be my father.
He had a mortgage, a car and a career before I was even born.
I have no patience with the oft quoted theory that ‘boys mature slower than girls.’ It’s not true.
Boys are forced to act like adults much later than girls are, our natural rates of maturity are not decided by our genitals.
My husband has never used his age as a trump card, or a suggestion that he knows more than I do.
But, very occasionally, when I’m feeling lost and confused and tired, I will turn to him and ask for his advice and because he’s older than me, and he’s already been here, he is in a position to give it.
In fact it was probably one of the better parts of the equation.