Griffin: If there's a throughline for things that are commonly said to dudes on "how to be a man," most of it is shitty behavior. So I can't think of much advice that we give that's like, "So if you want to really be a man..." We're much more concerned with just being decent and being good first.
How do teenage boys, in all their sloppy, rude glory, learn how to grow up into empathetic, sensible men—without getting ensnared in the many traps laid out by, say, predatory groups on the internet?
It's rare to see questions like these that even obliquely deal with the topic of modern masculinity tackled in honest, healthy ways, especially with the patience needed to handle a genuine journey of maturity.
Scientifically speaking, the last level of maturity is the ability to empathize with other people.
So focusing on "what is my role as a man"—or a woman—misses the real things of living, which is "how do I treat other people well, and serve other people well, in a way that doesn't reinforce the gender roles society has created, but at least is a credit to my gender, and tries to tip the scales back towards decency."Travis: If you say hold a door open for a woman and then slam it in a dude's face, it's like no, just hold the door open, because there's a human being coming behind you and maybe they're carrying packages.
It's not about because they're a woman or because you're a man.
It's because you're a person and they're a person. When we're talking about romantic or dating advice, most of our advice boils down to "No, that's embarrassing." Asking people out at work?
If someone says, "I hate my job," it's just like, yeah man, work sucks sometimes. So I really do on some level understand that pickup-artist shit, the idea of someone being like, "Just follow these eight steps! But I also think a lot of what it comes down to is we started doing the show with very little confidence in our ability to tell people how to live their life—which I think has continued to today—but we didn't like to give concrete answers to anyone.
" But just like any diet, if that were true, everyone would actually be doing it. So we were very careful about taking in all the elements and saying, "We don't know!
If the goal is, I'm going to meet people, and enjoy people's company, and try to be an enjoyable person who listens to them, that's a goal you can achieve.